Relapses, Ophelia, and Elizabeth Siddal--The First Super Model

The painting is by Millais, a pre-Raphaelite painter. The model, who may be the subject of my next book, is Elizabeth Siddal. Siddal was a poet, artist, and very popular model for a lot of Pre-Raphaelite art.
Elizabeth spent weeks in a bathtub posing as Ophelia from Hamlet. Ophelia legend has it that she walked out into a stream and floated on her back, singing and awaiting death as she moved with the current down the river. She succeeded at the suicide.

Lord May I Come?
By Elizabeth Siddal

Life and night are falling from me,
Death and day are opening on me,
Wherever my footsteps come and go,
Life is a stony way of woe.
Lord, have I long to go?

Hallow hearts are ever near me,
Soulless eyes have ceased to cheer me:
Lord may I come to thee?

Life and youth and summer weather
To my heart no joy can gather.
Lord, lift me from life’s stony way!
Loved eyes long closed in death watch for me:
Holy death is waiting for me

Lord, may I come to-day?

My outward life feels sad and stillLike lilies in a frozen rill;

I am gazing upwards to the sun,
Lord, Lord, remembering my lost one.
O Lord, remember me!

How is it in the unknown land?
Do the dead wander hand in hand?
God, give me trust in thee.

Do we clasp dead hands and quiver
With an endless joy for ever?
Do tall white angels gaze and wend
Along the banks where lilies bend?
Lord, we know not how this may be:
Good Lord we put our faith in thee

O God, remember me.

Elizabeth Siddal died of an overdose of laudanum, a solution of opiates mixed with alcohol that was a popular, over-the-counter drug during the 1800s. 

Anyone who has gotten better after depression fears a relapse of the bad times. A any moment a sufferer may fall prey to the disease, at least this is the perception of the victims of depression. It is a scary concept, I admit. Thank God for anti-depressive medications. They help a lot. But sometimes, they stop working as well.

The lovely young lady who posed for the picture above, Elizabeth Siddal, took her own life in 1862.  I suppose she just decided to "fall asleep." This beautiful and talented woman died at 32 years of age. The pre-Raphaelite writers and artists were drawn to melancholy. They were a lot like the Goths are today I suppose. The 1850 and 1860s, were still tough times throughout the world. The population battled incurable diseases, hunger, and wars still fought by staging huge battles and sending the soldiers, row upon row, into the fray. Many battled mental depression before Freudian psychotherapy. Laudanum may have been prescribed for the condition I expect.

Even today, depression is no walk in the park. It still can lead to self-harm or death. Sufferers can still relapse. But we, the people with the disease must count our blessings even in the midst of a severe episode. There is help out there, unlike the time when poor Lizzie took her life. So, if you suffer depression, call a mental health care professional. Americans can get appointments they can afford, or there are free services online for depression, even suicide hotlines.

Don't just give up.

Think you have nothing to offer to anyone? That is why I started this blog. Who knows more about depression than someone who has suffered its consequences. Please folks, even if you are suffering your own tough times, you can talk with other folks who suffer. Be proactive and help.